The Bad Days.

Some days are good, some days are bad. The good days are wonderful. You get to enjoy time with your friends, smile, laugh and know that it’ll be OK. The bad days you really feel the urge to just sleep the world away, and you pray that maybe tomorrow will be a good day.

Yesterday, well yesterday was a bad day. I had gotten home, and then… Well I don’t remember a lot of the evening. I ate, and then the seizures started rolling in. I said something on Twitter about it. My mom says she called. I slept. I slept a lot. 11pm rolls around and I decide to make my way up to bed. My legs were wobbly, I was wandering around like a staggering drunk.

To be honest, at some point I should have gone to the ER. I should have let them look at me. Make sure I wasn’t going brain dead or something stupid. Only problem with that is, they don’t know what to do with me. I can’t take Ativan anymore, their weapon of choice… So what? They stare at me while I feel miserable, and I feel even more miserable because I’m in an ER with blood taken and needles everywhere.

Knowing there’s nothing that they can do. Knowing that the best they can offer is next to nothing. That’s a kind of nightmare no one deserves. I mean, most people when they get sick they can go to a doctor, be given a pill and go home. They may not feel better immediately, but a few days they could. Even cancer patients have treatments. But there’s not much they can do with me. Not much other than use me as a pin cushion.

Today, I should stay in bed. I should watch some Netflix & sleep. But I refuse to give up my day because yesterday was a bad day. I refuse to let that happen. Today could be a good day, if I give it a chance.

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1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Miriam
    Oct 23, 2010 @ 12:13:43

    You summed it up so eloquently. Had a bad one myself around 11:30 p.m. on Thursday night. Hope you feel better.

    Reply

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